Dog gone it

    Before this week’s observations I did some research on things that dogs do not like (mother nature network). In my research, I found that dogs and Christian (me) are very similar. Dogs are said to not like it when the humans use words other than body language, and I Christian believe that the people who don’t speak with hands are sociopathic murderers. Another thing that dogs hate is hugging and petting their face/head, Christian is opposed to all kinds of touching. The next thing that dogs are said to ridicule, is not providing structure or rules; I already suffer from ADHD  and possibly other brain abnormalities I can’t handle not having strict and precise planning and structure in my life. This one is fairly obvious "forcing your dog to interact with dogs or people he clearly doesn't like". I typically like people, but if I don’t like you, you know that I don’t like you. This next one most masters don’t understand, "going for walks without opportunity to explore and smell". Just the other day I went to the doctor’s office and I tried to see everything there was too see in the room. But the master (dad) did not allow this, he told me to sit still and wait for the doctor. So after a minute I distracted my master with a game on one of those had held shiny things, at this time I looked at all the things in the room. Other things that dogs don’t like is when their humans are being boring, or tense. This is the reason I am an entertainer. I stop people from being tense or boring. When I was younger, I asked people if they were boring. I am still bad at first impressions.

      As you may have noticed, I am yet to take notice of the dog Jack. I have always known that jack is different than most dogs. Most of the rules that I have previously written about do not apply to the dog. The first rule that I mentioned, the one dealing words/body language does not apply to Jack. Jack does not care what you have to say, in this way he is like a honey badger. With the rule of dogs hating hugging, Jack hugs me. You know how dogs are said to not like their faces patted? One of jack’s favorite games is called slap snout: in this game my dad (the head-master) slaps jacks snout. And he loves this. “Not providing structure and rules", we tried hard to set guide lines for jack, again Jack is a honey badger. He doesn’t care. "Forcing your dog to interact with dogs he clearly doesn't like", well, I have never met a dog who Jack does not adore. So I don’t have experience with this topic. The rest of the rules Jack mostly follows, these are the rules dealing with being boring, tense, and not letting him adventure.

     The oddities of Jack could even inspire an average person, if you look at him the right way. 

    No matter how weird you look or how socially awkward you are, you still are what you are. Jack is a not an average dog. He is short, long, big, small, and just     wrong. But jack is still a dog; he will be what he is, despite how hard he tries. This brings me to the words of my favorite doctor. "A person is a person no matter how small (or big)" (Dr. Seuss).

jack and the woes of the world

      This week I gave Jack various kinds of food. Like most kids, Jack doesn't enjoy his vegetables, but, unlike children, Jack is not fond of most kinds of candy. However, he wants one of the only things that could possibly be his end, chocolate. 

     On day one, I was sitting on my bed, eyeing an old batch of movie theater popcorn. Not having a use for the stale stuff, I decided to give it (kernel by kernel) to the kid beside me. He loved it.

      Once Jack experimented with popcorn, I wanted to see what else he would eat. After popcorn, the obvious next choice is pop rocks. I placed a mild sized pile of pop rocks onto the ground, Jack approached, sniffed and then proceeded to eat. when the rocks took  hold of his mouth, the crackling and snapping of the atomic candy exploding in his jowls. I really expected Jack to run around in search of water, this did not occur. Instead the dog just looked up at me, paused, and walked away. This was one of the instances that I have wondered, "do dogs know more that the humans perceive?"(Observation journal). 

      The next time that Jack came into contact with human food (to my knowledge) was two days later. The location, my bed. The time, bed time. Murder weapon chocolate. (No, Jack does not die). So I was lying on my bed, pushing off sleeping. At this time The Dog, Jack, jumps on my bed, sniffs around and eventually lies down. After a little while I open a package of Twix, Jack being the young spry pooch that he is comes and asks me what I’m doing. I told Jack a saying that my grandfather told me, "curiosity killed the cat, and chocolate kills the dog".  Jack did not listen to my council, one thing lead to another and the dog was sick in the morning.

       At first glance, this is a story of a boy and his dog. But if you look at this story with metaphorical eyes, you can see the entirety of human nature. 

You see jack. The world gives him a gift (popcorn); the little dog believes that he is on the up side of life. Then the world gives you something that seems sweet on appearances, but quite literally blows up in your face (pop rocks). At this point the dog is striving for anything to go his way. He even goes as far as thievery to get what he wants (the taking of the chocolate). This bringing the pooch to his tragic downfall (again the dog is very alive).